so i've been reflecting a lot in the past couple of days, just about the past year, about how different things were this time last year. been thinking about all the things that have come and gone, circumstances of joy and sorrow, times of trial and times of jubilation, and all the things that i have been taught and have learned as a result...
in all this reflecting, i've come to really see how good God really is, how much i am truly loved and cherished by Him, as evidenced by the numerous blessings that He has poured out on me. i think often times, i don't know if it's a girl thing or just a human being thing, but often times i can easily fall into the trap of thinking that i'm not as loved and cherished because i lack validation from others.... that i am easily forgotten and looked over because i usually don't feel comfortable in the limelight.... and yet, God has yet again through some prodding over the past couple of days reminded me that i am indeed loved and not forgotten... and that He sacrificed His only Son so that i could have life, and life to the fullest. life to the fullest doesn't translate into a life of lament and longing to be seen and noticed... it's a life to be lived in joy, no matter the circumstances, a life filled with blessings, ones we count and ones we don't even recognize as blessings, a life of love, to be loved and love (ultimately by the One who IS love).
i guess i can share about some of the blessings that have been given me in the past year, and how through it all, God has showered His goodness :)
- getting to know and love a fellowship and church in which i am growing and learning in abundance
- being part of a softball team last summer that allowed me to get to know some of the younger ones at church
- going to nicaragua and learning all the things that God revealed to me while i was there, falling in love with the culture and the country, getting to know the people, and developing this passion and burden to learn spanish and perhaps go back one day in the near future
- growth in my faith, and a time of great intimacy with God during a season of singleness that came with much hesitation and fear
- development of friendships and bonds with people at yccf during the school year
- development of friendships with design students that will hopefully last even after we all graduate and are "designers"
- finding brothers and sisters in Christ who watch out for and care for me, keeping me accountable, and encouraging me to grow and to learn and to pursue the path God has set out for me
- growing close to a brother in Christ who has been there for me time and again, spurring me on to greater intimacy with God, and further pursuit of personal growth
- growing closer to two sisters in Christ in particular who i can be completely real and transparent with
- finding time to spend with my life-long friend and sister, picking up where we left off
- having two close guy friends become Christian and picking up with them where we left off after graduating from high school
and so as life continues on, another year has come and gone, aside from the personal goal and theme that i set out back in january of being a blessing, here's hoping this is something else that i can keep in my head and heart...